Weed in God’s Garden- The Key

I started writing my first novella thirteen years ago during the darkest period of my life which is why I’m dedicating this story to a man who told me not to smoke weed as I started my spiritual journey. He made my life hell during the long isolating path until I decided to leave with nothing but my old manuscripts, a couple of outfits and my journals.

Finishing Weed in God’s Garden is very strange for me because I didn’t expect to have this vision out of my head, in words bound between a hand drawn cover. It solidifies something within me that I have yet to figure it out, but the good news is I can at least call myself a published author who’s indie. What’s really blowing my mind is drawing a manga beside the novella. I remember praying to God to give me subjects for a muse. This is during COVID when everything was cheap. I bought a lot of paints, was experimenting and really wanted a creative project to dedicate my life to.

I always keep thinking about them.

These people in my head that don’t feel like manifestations from trauma. I don’t use them to escape reality because life is what it is and whatever I make out of it. I get a sense that this is a memory of a different reality I have to pull out of my head to completion. However in order to do that I have to transform and renew my mind so it wont be conformed to this world I’m in now (not that it’s bad, I’m having a ball).

There are many distractions and I’ve picked up what triggers me to look away from this saga. Maybe that “something” I don’t know is just FOCUS. Committing to what I love not for the game, to feed the beast, or sparkle faintly when I see the red bubbles. But to finish what I’m starting. To sink deeply into what I love.

Weed in God’s Garden is the Key. I had to be sober during the editing and formatting stages. Happily, I no longer have the desire to drink or smoke since there’s a new rush that’s far more satisfying. I had to push that fear of exposing this inner world compiled with my thoughts and experiences to get this story out. I discovered I’m not quite as friendly as I thought I was especially with my time and energy towards this passion project and my family that’s going to be transformed by it-not just me.

Time is of the essence. Go towards what you love now with compassion, but don’t let people hinder you. Gotta be tough in life and that’s what this book taught me. I REALLY wanted to kick off my writing career. Not only did i have to be tough with others, I had to be tough with myself and take accountability of my past failures. One of my biggest problems is deleting my work. That damn fear.

But!!! Now that I have the key and walked through the door, I have no reason to delete anything anymore. I’d be an idiot of I did.